Wednesday, August 10, 2005

so here i am, very cynical about life, about people, and i've given up on humans (actually i may have around 8 years ago). so after all is said and done i'm glad that i didn't look like the asshole, and the liar. from the start i told you that i didn't want another trevor and you said you weren't. why would you, you said. what would be in it for you? well at this point i can make a whole list as to what was in it for you. at least what you proved to be in it for you. so in the end it came down to one big lie, and all the times you said "don't do this to us." and "ariel AGAIN?" shut the fuck up. but in the end you played me and holy shit did you play me well, collect your medal at the door. but the sad thing is, it was all in front of my face the whole time. the whole time i knew what was going on, don't think i didn't, but i just thought you meant more with me. i kept thinking "well he does this and this but he doesn't with anyone else;" at this point i doubt you meant anything you said to anyone. and after all is said and done i get an e-mail a few weeks later of an e-mail i sent you. and what the fuck did you think was going to happen. suddenly i would be like OH I'M SO SORRY LETS MAKE UP. please. and it's funny how after you did that you and ariel were talking again. so did it come down to i'll put out some e-mails and see who responds? get some other 13-16 year old to feed your fucking ego. you aren't worth anything to me. and your baby didn't cry, i didn't cry when it was all said and done. i was greatful, b/c having you out of my life made my days better. i'd rather sit on here and have late talks with luke about making mixed tapes and how much we dislike humans. i'd rather be up late laughing my ass off with christina while we post pictures of penguins and moose then waste another second of my life on you. you aren't worth anything to me. and in the end in came down to one thing:

my little piggy needed something new.

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